part 3, my world, my dreams, manifested

As we fly along, the wind's fingers run through my hair, whipping it about making me feel free. I still have a hint of sadness. I need something else, and nothing that poor Nova can give me. I manifest my favorite person to me and she comes without hesitation. She is a petite little thing with brown eyes that are deep and knowing. She has black hair with silver streaks in it, giving her a stunning salt and pepper look. She is the most beautiful woman I know. We sit and talk for what seems like hours, and Nova, sensing how I need the human companionship so desperately hides away in his little piece of cloud and gives us space. She hugs me and I hold on so tightly I know she's wondering if I'll ever let go, and in a way it seems like she doesn't want to let me go either. We ride a little while longer and talk about what's happened since I have left her side, what is happening in her life, her hopes and dreams, and the conversation turns to me. I tell her of the life I've made, all my dreams that have come true...all but the one that I've been waiting all my life to have. She tells me that everything will turn out ok, not to be disheartened or give up because it will happen, and soon. She tells me how much she loves me, one last time, and I bid her go, so she can live her life again. Her place is not with me, not in this world, but to come and go when I need her, and the same as her world is not of mine. I can go to her when she calls me also.
We continue our ride in silence, I reflect on my conversation and Nova releases a sigh of contentment. He knows I'm feeling much better and is thankful to the woman for helping me. We land finally on a rainbow lake and our cloud car turns into a cloud boat and we look out over the water, watching the seagulls swoop and the dolphins do tricks in the air it is breathtakingly miraculous. I look down into the lake, it looks like glass, all black and sleek and shiny. As I stare I can see my future unfolding below me, the paths that I can take, and the obsticals that can get in my way, what will happen if I choose the wrong path. It also shows all my dreams, if they become my reality and if I have what it takes to accomplish them.
I stare long and hard trying to find the path that I want to take, knowing all the while I will not find it. You see, it only shows what might be and should be, not what will be. The path I'm looking for I'm already on, and I'm looking for the answers to the future that will be, and those I cannot know, it's not for me to see, at least not yet. So I mull over the ones that will never be, and the ones that could be. Nova quietly asks what I want to know. And, even to him, I can't form the words to what I want to know. I turn back to the middle of the boat and lay down, looking up to the sky, and watching it turn millions of hues of green. I close my eyes and relax, Nova scurries up and lays contententedly on my chest. We drift along lazily.